Eulogy for my first husband

George Stephen Simpson

April 29, 1951 – June 25, 2012

George in 1974 with Galaxy and Sparky

Just yesterday morning they let me know you were gone
Susanne the plans they made put an end to you
I walked out this morning and I wrote down this song
I just can't remember who to send it to
I've seen fire and I've seen rain
I've seen sunny days that I thought would never end
I've seen lonely times when I could not find a friend
But I always thought that I'd see you again

These lyrics have been swimming around in my head since last Wednesday at 4:55 pm when George’s brother Phil called me from Tennessee to tell me that George had passed-- On Lopez Island, one island over from me, all alone.  They found his body two days later.  I worried about his dogs.  When I looked for an obituary I found his name, birth and death dates.  Nothing about him.  So even though we’ve been divorced for over thirty years I am feeling that I should acknowledge him by writing the story of his life as far as I know of it.

George was the first child born to Joe and Ann Simpson on April 29 (The date the Golden Spike was laid) 1951.  He was born into a railroad family and they moved all over the Northwest as his father moved up the corporate ladder.  He lived in Seattle, Spokane, Missoula, Livingston, and eventually Billings.

His brother Phil was born six years after George.  George had been an only child so long he had a hard time adjusting to his younger brother, telling the story of throwing rocks at the nursery window.  George worked summers for what is now Burlington Northern—in Auburn and later in Billings when his parents settled there.

During his High School years they lived near Lincoln Park in Seattle and he went to West Seattle High School, graduating in 1969.  He earned his undergraduate degree graduating Magna Cum Laude in the Honors Program and continued on in Graduate School at Washington State University in Pullman.  He loved Edwardian poets like Robert Browning.  As a graduate student, he taught a course in parapsychology and was immersed one semester in the occult, witchcraft, and Emanuel Swedenborg.

We eloped in June 1975, moved to Seattle, and started working as paralegals in the law offices of my father and Doug Moreland.  As paralegals, we interviewed clients, ran errands, did some bookkeeping.  George and I separated in 1978, but he continued to work for my father for eleven years.  Once he left there, he worked a variety of office jobs and eventually came to work for National Oceanic and Atmospheric Administration (NOAA) in Fish Inspections.

It was through his work at NOAA that he met his second wife, Barbara Estenson.  Barbara owned land on Lopez and for many years they lived in Seattle during the week and came to the island on weekends with their dogs.  Barbara preceded George in death in October of 2009.  George continued to spend weekends in her home and planned to stay there permanently upon retirement at age 62.  His diabetes and poor general health prevented him from achieving that goal.

I remember George as being smart, witty, funny as hell and always telling a good story.  Most of his stories were about himself and were embellished with each retelling.  Even if I had been there I would not recognize the event after the third or fourth retelling.  George had a tendency to “compartmentalize” his life.  He had his work friends, his relatives, his bar buddies.  He did not share information between these separate groups.  No one got the complete picture of what was happening in his life.  He could make friends with anyone from a bum on the street to a corporate executive.  George admired Charles Bukowski—he identified with down and outers. One critic has described Bukowski's fiction as a "detailed depiction of a certain taboo male fantasy: the uninhibited bachelor, slobby, anti-social, and utterly free".  George was too genteel, generous and generally nice to fit that depiction.  But he had a certain fascination with that world.

 

He liked Elvis Presley, basketball, pinball, and dogs, dogs, dogs.  Not sure what else he gravitated to over the thirty years we’ve been separated.  But these tastes probably remained the same.

My father and I went to visit George at his wife’s place on Lopez in July of 2010.  Although we communicated at Christmas and birthdays and on e-mail, I had no idea that his health had taken a turn for the worse.  I know when we were in college together he doubted he would live until 40, but it almost seems as if he had to prove himself right about dying young.  He will be missed.

  

George with Joe Barreca Sr in July 2010

Family Reunion

The Artists' Studio Tour started off the month.  Even though I was knee-deep in preparations for the big family reunion the following weekend, I took a few hours off to check out three or four studios with a friend. 

The following weekend was supposed to be rainy and gray, like most Junes in the Pacific NW.  But lo and behold, the sun came out with the arrival of our first guests on Friday afternoon. 

Antonio Mazzola and the Birthday Boy, Ol' JB himself

It was a special event, for sure, a family celebration to honor my father on his 90th birthday. Relatives came from all over the United States.  The farthest and most special was the arrival of our cousin Antonio Mazzola from Germany with his wife Renate.  Jeannette, Bill, Matthew, and I met Antonio in 2009 on my first trip to Sicily. He wanted to come for the reunion and meet his American cousins--what a shock we must have been!  (Following the reunion, Antonio and Renate travelled around the state to visit family and then down the coast to San Diego.)

The big dinner was Saturday night at the Grange hall.  That afternoon we decorated and Inlaws and Outllaws rehearsed.  It was a memorable night.

from left: Joe Jr (in back), Roger, Bill, Marc, and Tony on drums

Seventy-two relatives joined in the dinner and many of them stayed over through the weekend, biking, kayaking, whale-watching, and partying.  Many came to an impromptu potluck at Rosalie and Tom's on Sunday so we were able to get a group shot:

The following week I got the worst cold I can remember--surprise, surprise.  But life must go on and I pushed through, for Roger and I were due in Spokane for the State Grange Convention.  I had volunteered to be a delegate representing the San Juan County Pomona Grange.  We had a very interesting time but I cannot tell you about it here on the blog as only Grange members are allowed to know the inner workings and the secret handshakes.  One evening we did play hooky and walked around downtown Spokane and their very beautiful riverside park.

click here to see pictures of Spokane Riverside Park

On our way home from Spokane, we stopped to see friends with some land near Cle Elum.  They have a place right on the Yakima River and we got to explore some of its features with them.

Roger, Shelley and David at the "Grand Canyon"

You would think that was enough events for one month, but this was not the case.  One more adventure awaited us.  The wedding of Hilary and Abe took place at the Washington Park Arboretum on June 30th.  It was fun to see family, friends from the island, and friends from our old neighborhood in Seattle all at the same celebration.

And it is always good to see the grandchildren having a fun time. 

 In July--I rest.